HI! WELCOME TO BLOG POST #5!
If you would’ve asked me 5 years ago where I imagined myself at 25 my answer would have been, “married to the love of my life/best friend + a house with a white picket fence.” Let’s all laugh together.. Lol
Let me begin by saying, there’s absolutely NOTHING wrong with having those kinds of dreams. They are beautiful dreams to have and if you were blessed enough to have met your soul mate within that time frame of your life, CONGRATULATIONS!! Seriously. However, speaking as the woman who is approaching 25 in JUST 4 months, my mindset has altered a bit and I have different dreams now. Dreams that I never that I would have! The last couple of years have taught me many lessons, both as an individual and as a woman. I can honestly say with my whole being that I have FINALLY approached the point in my life where I’m COMPLETELY OKAY with being alone because I know it’s not forever.
Growing up I remember being completely boy crazy. I was always chasing after some boy and finding myself more lost after each relationship. My mom got pregnant with me at a young age and was always super strict when it came to boys. I always had a curfew and wasn’t able to stay out late. Being the rebellious teenage girl, I was always trying to find ways to break the rules. *Sorry mama
I’ve done some reflecting and I’ve found that the main reason why I was boy crazy for so many years of my life was because I dreaded the thought of being alone. I always wanted to feel wanted/needed/loved and who doesn’t?! I realize now all the pain that could have been avoided if I let go of that fear and allowed myself to grow through the hurt.
Over the years I’ve had my fair share of makeups, breakups, heartbreaks, and tears.
No matter what they did, I would always forgive them and choose to stay with them because of that fear I held onto. I figured that coping with the hurt was better than losing them completely.
I used to seek validation from men just to feel “worthy”, which is quite embarrassing to admit but true. I would also depend on men to meet some, if not all my needs. I was lost and insecure with who I was. It wasn’t until I took the focus off them and put it on myself. The cold hard truth was; the problem wasn’t just them, it was me. I needed to change. I needed to find myself and focus on becoming the person that I was seeking.
Don’t get me wrong, I still have my days where I’m scrolling through Instagram and happen to see all these “perfect” couple engagement pics and get salty but I don’t stay there. Lol. I am forever grateful for this time in my life. I look forward to the days when I accomplish all the dreams I have independently 1st.
My advice to you is, wherever you are in life, be patient with yourself and allow yourself to find joy in where you are. You may never get this opportunity again so embrace the NOW. Work each day on where you want to BE and on who you want to BECOME. It’s never too late to DECIDE to choose happiness and choose yourself. KNOW YOUR WORTH & DON’T SETTLE FOR LESS than that! When you know better you do better, so DO BETTER. MUCH LOVE.
QUOTES 4 ALL MY SINGLES:
“Be more concerned with BECOMING the RIGHT woman than FINDING the RIGHT man.”
“It takes a strong person to remain single in a world that is accustomed to settling with anything just to say they have something.”
“Not everyone who is single is lonely; not everyone who is taken is in love.”
“You must enter a relationship with yourself before anyone else.”
“Choose people who choose you.”
“Being brave enough to be alone frees you up to invite people into your life because you want them and not because you need them.”
“You don’t find your worth in a man. You find your worth within yourself and then find a man who’s worthy of you. Remember that.”